Billie

My heart burns brightly for the Olympia Food Co-op.

Wed, 21 Oct 2009 05:57:47 GMT

So I had a cashier volunteer training at the Olympia Food Co-op today. Why not be there more often, see about three quarters of the people I know in Olympia in about 2 hours, and get a discount? I mean, when I'm in a bad mood, I'll just wander the few blocks, peruse the cheese isle or the Free Store, and sit and chat on the bench eating an apple that no, I didn't buy there, but in fact picked in the alleyway behind the store. I won't be any means say I'm the only one who does that. I have had many a fond conversation with the cashiers. Most recently I argued with one about what a famiscile of a sham NASA is for bombing the moon while 'stamping' some figs.

The cashier trainer's name was Diane (Dee-AH-nuh). She made some comments about this that and the other, about how trust-based everything is, and the importance of respect over a glossy image, how when cashiers are having a bad day they shouldn't by any means put on a fake smile. We need to create and maintain community, and focus on the quality and exchange of really good food.

"The co-op isn't like one of those well-oiled machines," she said. "I mean, on any given day people are wandering around having earth-shaking spiritual revelations in the aisles."

I responded to a craigslist housing ad today...

Wed, 07 Oct 2009 02:42:25 GMT

Original post:

http://seattle.craigslist.org/oly/roo/1409546971.html

"Furnished Room, with Loft and bath For Rent
$500.00
For One Person with no pets....

...They must be considerate of the owner’s things and able and willing to cheerfully cooperate in the necessary chores and know how to and enjoy sharing upon occasion. They must be free of serious addictions, no drugs use, alcoholism or mental illness. They must have good values, a strong willingness to recycle, compost and partake in a vegetable garden. "

My response:

"Hello,

I read your craigslist ad for the very nice house with vegetable garden today. I wanted to address your stated requirement that your new roommate be free of "mental illness". Having suffered from depression myself, I would like to bring light to the fact that depression is considered by the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM), which is the American Psychiatric Association's standard reference for psychiatry, a mental disorder. In addition to this, bipolar disorder, anxiety disorder, anorexia disorder, asperger disorder, "caffiene-related disorder", downs syndrome, gender identity disorder, insomnia, narcissistic personality disorder, obsessive compulsive disorder, PTSD, premature ejaculation disorder, stuttering. vaginismus, and, until recently, homosexuality are conditions that qualify as "mental illness". (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_mental_disorders_as_defined_by_the_DSM_and_ICD)

I would find it hard to believe that not a one of your closest friends and family could be considered, by the APA's standards, to have a mental disorder. Perhaps you yourself suffered from body dysmorphic disorder or anorexia as a teenager (understandably! look at the society we live in, with fashion magazines and billboards telling young people how they should look and act). And who are you to discriminate against a perfectly functioning, communicative potential roommate...with premature ejaculation disorder. Oops. Doesn't qualify. Or perhaps she is perfectly functioning with a mild case of PTSD, because she survived abuse in her childhood. By your standards, the nicest, savviest gardener can't live in your home because, God forbid, he has a stutter.

It is by our society's very design that these people are oppressed. These "disorders", "illnesses", and "conditions" are simply labels fabricated to more easily categorize people, and none of them take into account the whole person. Our modern psychiatric body of knowledge was primarily developed by straight, white men with their own interests. Perhaps this would explain why as recently as the late 19th century "hysteria" in women was associated with menstruation, pregnancy, and menopause and was treated by solitary confinement (http://www.cwrl.utexas.edu/~ulrich/femhist/madness.shtml#hysteria).

While homosexuality was thankfully taken off the APA's list, "gender identity disorder" is holding fast. Not only are trans and genderqueer people oppressed by your average joe, they are written into official manuals as being crazy.

Our words are powerful, and vestiges of the patriarchy, homophobia, racism are deeply entrenched in our language, colloquially and officially.

Don't get me wrong, you can live with whoever you want. But not only is requiring, publicy, that the person you live with be "free of mental illness" an oppressive and uninformed move, it is, in fact, illegal:

"When making any posting on craigslist, you must comply with section 3604(c) of the Federal Fair Housing Act. This law generally prohibits stating, in any notice or ad for the sale or rental of a dwelling, a discriminatory preference based on any of the following protected categories:

Race or Color
National Origin
Religion
Sex
Familial Status (more)
Handicap / Disability (more)"

(http://www.craigslist.org/about/FHA)

Sincerely,

A concerned housing browser"

Pssst...check out the Icarus Project

A word about Adaptogens

Sun, 13 Sep 2009 21:04:42 GMT

(adapted from Shatoiya de la Tour's Earth Mother Herbal):

"Adaptogens are herbs that help the body to deal with stress within and without. Siberian Ginseng, or Eluthero, is the medicine for modern humans. This plant remedy is perfectly suited to deal with many of the stresses we have created and allow ourselves to be subjected to in this modern world. It therefore seems appropriate that many of its healing elements were discovered during the postindustrial revolution.

Change came relatively slowly for humans of the centuries. Life from one generation to the next would reflect the slow development of progress. Life changed but remained recognizable by the elders for their entire life. How out of place to elders feel today? These people grew up without TV, CDs, DVDs, and a whole lot more initials that weren't even conceived a generation ago. Life for me is completely alien to the life my grandmother lived. People and communities had time to accept changes; now we must process quickly or be confused. So, what must we do to survive in such a rapidly changing environment? Adapt, and that's where Siberian ginseng comes in. A new herbal medicine for a new host of ailments, Siberian ginseng helps the body adapt to a wide range of factors. Russian studies showed that workers who used it were able to better handle a wider range of adverse conditions, including adverse weather. They were better able to deal with adverse emotional conditions present in the workplace such as stress, long hours, and exposure to environmental and biological pathogens.

If you are looking for a tonic herb to promote general well-being and you are dealing with stress in any or all its manifestations, then consider Siberian ginseng as an ally."

From Wikipedia article on Adaptogens:

   1. An adaptogen is nontoxic to the recipient.
   2. An adaptogen produces a nonspecific response in the body—an increase in the power of resistance against multiple stressors including physical, chemical, or biological agents.
   3. An adaptogen has a normalizing influence on physiology, irrespective of the direction of change from physiological norms caused by the stressor.

Other adaptogens include:

Reishi mushroom, Maca, Holy basil, licorice, Ashwaganda, and others.

All you laaaadies read this shit! Tampons and pads suck.

Mon, 03 Aug 2009 23:21:18 GMT

From "What your momma (or your doctor or your teacher or anybody) never told you about your period":

"The feminine hygiene industry's toll on health and the enviroment:

A menstruator is likely to use 16,800 sanitary pads or tampons in a lifetime.
Tampons soak up more than just blood. They also absorb vaginal mucous, which is necessary to maintain a healthy pH balance in the vagina; this phenomenon has been linked to yeast infections.
Artificial fibers (like rayon) used in tampons are abrasive, so when a tampon lengthens it pushes against the cervical area, causing tiny cuts and imbedding pieces into the tissue. This has been traced as the probable cause of Toxic Shock Syndrome and has been shown to damage the vaginal walls by causing ulceration and peeling of the mucous membrane.
The vaginal walls are the most absorbent part of the menstruator's body. 25% of all pesticides are used on cotton, which are used to make tampons. No long-term independent testing has been done on the health effects of using non-organic cotton tampons.
Toxic Shock Syndrome (TSS): TSS has been linked to tampon use and the high absorbency level in tampons. The number of reported cases has dropped significantly in recent years, from 55 deaths and 1,066 cases during 1979 and 1980 to 5 reported cases in 1997 and 3 in 1998, due to increased regulation of the FDA of tampon absorbency and changes in tampon ingredients. (Tampon Safety, FDA).
Five of the top nine pesticides used on cotton in the U.S. (cyanide, dicofol, naled, propargite, and trifluralin) are KNOWN cancer-causing chemicals. All nine are classified by the U.S. EPA as Category 1 and 2, the most dangerous.
In California, it has become illegal to feed the leaves, stems, and short fibers of cotton known as gin trash to livestock, because of the concentrated levels of pesticide residue. Instead, this gin trash is used to make furniture, mattresses, tampons, swabs, and cotton balls."

What should I use instead?!?

Homemade cloth menstrual pads or Lunapads/Gladrags, etc:

Reusable menstrual cup like Keeper or Diva Cup (I've been using one for 2 years, it's the best thing ever!):

Check out:

Tampaction Campaign: www.seac.org/tampons
S.P.O.T: www.spotsite.org
The Red Spot: onewoman.com/redspot/index.html
Cunt: A declaration of Independence Inga Muscio; Seal Press, 1998

BIRTHDAY EXTRAVAGANZA!

Tue, 14 Jul 2009 20:41:27 GMT

BILLIE'S BIRTHDAY POTLUCK/SQUARE DANCE/PARTYGANZA

Thursday, July 16th, 2009. 5 p.m.

The Nut House: 2220 Walnut Rd. NW, Olympia, WA

Featuring the Grizzle Grazzle Tune Snugglers and various callers!
All dances called! Beginners welcome! Drunk assholes not! :D
Camping space available in our spacious, forested backyard.
RSVP for more info: taraxacum (at) riseup (dot) net

Approaching the end of my teenagehood.

Mon, 06 Jul 2009 18:51:12 GMT

I keep seeing all these people from last summer and having some interesting flashbacks. It's pretty cool that life works in circles.

My friend Callie and I biked to Port Townsend last week for Fiddle Tunes Fest on the 101. We took two days to do it. It was my first bike trip. I was glad Callie and I had similar attitudes about pace. We stopped at nice looking bodies of water, whenever we saw smoked salmon, at the top of hills, in the middle of hills, before big hills...

I spent a week with Gertie (my fiddle) and square danced until my legs fell off. On the last night I pulled a real, serious, actual all-nighter to watch the sunrise on the pier with a really cute grrrl.

My birthday is on July 16th.

Swine flu herbal preparedness

Tue, 05 May 2009 21:02:06 GMT

Whether the swine flu is a real concern, or an attempt by the
pharmaceutical companies to make more money on vaccines, this might be
helpful information.

X-posted. Forward this or post where-ever you like

Herbal Pandemic Preparedness
Sources: Farmacy Herbs, Karlo Berger, American Red Cross.

Step One Prevention:
If the flu hits your area the best practice is prevention

Tea:
Sage, Skullcap, Oregano, Thyme, Elder Flower, Holy Basil, Nettle.
2-3 cups daily

Tincture:
Echinacea 2x daily; 2 dropperful (One week on, one week off)
Astragulus Tea (3 cups) or Tincture( 2 dropperful 3x daily)

Food;
Miso, raw garlic, veggie broths, Cayenne pepper, Turmeric, organic
veggies, meats and grains.
Stay away from processed foods, food coloring and sugar and alcohol
(sugars in the body feed bacteria and viruses) and coffee (coffee
dehydrates the body and depletes you of vitamins and minerals that will
help fight off pathogens).

Anti-Viral/ Anti-biotic Hand Wash:
10 drops grapefruit seed extract/ 10 drops tea tree essential oil extract
in 1 gallon water

Antiseptic Spray for surfaces:
Vodka, Water, Tea Tree Oil, Lavender Essential oil. Disinfect door knobs
switches , handles, toys and other surfaces that are commonly touched.

Air Sanitizer:
Simmer water on low heat in a pot with 5 drops Eucalyptus Essential Oil or
5 drops Tea Tree Essential Oil or Lavender Essential Oil

If you do come down with the flu, then focus on immunity!

Continue tea:
Sage, Skullcap, Oregano, Thyme, Elder Flower, Holy Basil, Nettle.
(1 quart daily.)

add these tinctures 2 droperfull 3x daily
Meadowsweet, Japanese Knotweed, Turmeric
(keep up the echinacea and the astragulus)

Colloidal Silver: 2 squirts three times daily

Vitamin C 20000 mg daily

Grapefruit seed Extract: 1/4 teaspoon once daily.

Sleep Aids/ Pain Relief:
Valerian, Chamomile, White Willow Bark, Lemon Balm, St. Johns Wort
Take 1-2 squirts of tincture as needed or 1-2 cups of tea as needed

Stay home and avoid sharing items with household members (pens, papers,
computers, remote control. sheets, towels eating utensils, food.)

Wear a surgical mask when around others.

Clean sheets, bedding and clothes every day.

Take baths with 10 drops of lavender essential oil and 10 drops rosemary
essential oil and sea salt.
If your fever is high, use lukewarm water, if your fever is not high, hot
baths are okay.
(Remember fevers are our bodies way of heating up to kill pathogens. Very
high fevers are dangerous, but a low fever is actually good)

Drink veggie and chicken broths with miso and raw garlic (tons of it!) and
a pinch of Cayenne Pepper.

If you have an appetite eat only organic brown rice and greens/ steamed
veggies ( the simpler the better with food, if you put food that is hard
to digest in your body, your energy goes to digesting, rather than
fighting pathogens)

Air sanitizer: Water steam with Eucalyptus Essential Oil or Tea Tree
Essential Oil or Lavender Oil (do this in the room every 5 hours)

Caregivers should wear disposable gloves and wearing a mask when giving care.

"This info is not intended to diagnose or treat the flu, and has not been
evaluated by the FDA"

Shady grove my little miss, shady grove my darlin'...

Fri, 10 Apr 2009 01:25:34 GMT

I'm rolling in busy, I can't wait until life slows down and I can loll across the country with my banjo and fiddle.

I'm a-pickin' , boom-chucking and droning to Weiser, Idaho, then Port Townsend, then Clifftop, WV; Virginia, and North Carolina for Old Time festies, then back to Oly and down to Centralia.

I am doing a project in my class about identifying trees, plants, and lichens in Olympia, we've harvesting tasty nettle, pacific waterleaf, coltsfoot, miner's lettuce, hopefully oyster mushrooms. Not to mention dandelion. I found out you can eat maple blossoms. Mmm.

I am so blessed. Up the northwest!

WOO!

Fri, 06 Feb 2009 07:11:49 GMT

I am a working womyn. I work at the student employment office 15 gdamn hours a week.

I think I am going to move into a cabin. Awesome.

mary x mass

Fri, 26 Dec 2008 01:15:09 GMT

Being in Corvallis isn't so bad.

I reconnected with Isaac/Oliver and I'm realizing we have a LOT in common. It's kind of unreal, except very, very real--I have a connection with him that is deeper in a way than those with friends I knew for years pre-Olympia, and deeper certainly than those with my closest friends in Olympia. Not like we're best friends or instant lovers or anything, but our similar social conditioning and subsequent radicalization has brought us to strikingly simliar places in our lives. He's certainly seen more of the world than I have, but our interests resonate and there's a lot I can learn from him. Plus we can gossip about the same people we grew up with. :D

I've had way too many food comas this holiday season. Christ in a bookbag.

Hey, I'm starting school at Evergreen this winter! "Trees and Humans: Ecology, Art and Culture". 16 credit course.

So many attainable dreams/preparing for the collapse/money fucking sucks

Fri, 17 Oct 2008 20:51:32 GMT

God. I hate money. I locked my keys inside my house and lost my phone. Now I'm down the street using the internet at Chez Cascadia (the hostel) looking up part-time jobs. I need a specific talent that will translate to money. Idea! Massage school. Fuck, that costs $10,000 to complete, and I'm pretty sure being married won't help with that one.

I'm starting Evergreen this winter, most likely, and when I finish Evergreen or sometime as an interlude I will go to Herb School, maybe Cedar Mountain Herb School in the Skagit Valley. My friend and I may start up little wildcrafting business or something, as fucked up as selling nature for money is if I can cull money from yuppies doing something I love whatever, or maybe Radiance will hire me...but I'll definitely use those skills to do consultations at the Olympia Free Herbal Clinic sometime down the line. That's my dream.

Being an anarchist and an activist is my full-time devotion. Community building is absolutely essential with imminent r(evolution)/crisis/collapse/apocalypse. We need edible forest gardens in every yard...sometime I'm learning how to hunt. And not just hunt cops. Though community self-defense is absolutely essential. We need to up the ante. More literature, more widespread...this summer I'm touring with all the zines and broadsides I'll make and print after I learn how to use all the fancy printing presses at Last Word Books and all the music I'll have made when I get people to accompany me and my banjo.

Fucking money. I don't want my kidney to explode doing a medical study. But...rent. Fuck.

My dreams:

Olympia will become a Sanctuary City for war resisters/undocumented immigrants
Cascadia will secede

The Spectacle

Tue, 26 Aug 2008 03:16:05 GMT

Disrupting the DNC: Making a Break From the Politics of Assimilation

By strongwindsahead
We find ourselves in a pivotal time in world history with the Bush Regime drawing to a close. An immoral, costly, and unwinnable war rages on, people are feeling the hit of a corrupt economy, and ecological crises are now too large to ignore. This and other byproducts of neoliberalism is propelling people to call for something different.

It is in this space for desired change that the direction of social movements will be shaped. For those in power, the challenge of maintaining the legitimacy of a system which continues to widen the wealth gap, relies on imperial violence and throttles forward with unsustainable development and consumption is becoming more and more daunting. For the protectors of state power and free trade agreements it is essential that they acknowledge the disparites and injustices of the world in a way that casts them not as the purveyors of violence that they are, but the remedy to it.

Getting away with such glaring double talk would seem near impossible, but the plan seems to be going well so far. The Democratic Party has long been the party of cooptation and again it is stepping into its role as people seek a break with the policies of Bush and his cabinet. Their presidential nominee, Barack Obama, is a perfect candidate to siphon discontent with the state back into the political machinery.

From Community Organizer to Politician

Obama’s stint as a community organizer gives him a populist flavor that distances him from Capitol Hill politics. His rhetoric calls for a departure from politics as usual and for change where people have a genuine voice in the political process. The fact that his talk of “change we can believe in” has struck a chord with so many, is a powerful testament to the increasing illegitimacy of the US government. Many people involved in grassroots social movements have been appalled and frustrated with the Obama campaign’s willingness to glean language from genuine efforts for change from the bottom up- calling a political campaign a movement and offering a corrupt system as a means to liberatory ends, but the fact that people have such expectations, as false as they might be, for paths towards change is actually deeply positive. It is positive because the rhetoric of Obama does not match the reality of the Democratic Party or his campaign.
While Obama has certainly used some different tactics in his political campaign, the process and the ultimate goal of his candidacy upholds the same hierarchies that dominate the politial and economic spheres of the country and global society. In fact, Obama himself made a deliberate switch from community organizer to politician in Chicago where he redrew his district’s boundaries to shift the demographics from a largely working class, African-American population to incorporate the richer and whiter high end downtown area. This redrawing of the district reflects the way in which Obama shifted his attention and allegiances from the community, to the ruling elite. And the campaign has been largely successful- Obama has been able to maintain support for the paradigm of the War on Terror and call for the expansion of the largest military in the world, while simultaneously being cast as the anti-war candidate. The campaign is bringing in unprecedented millions of dollars each month, largely from the wealthy, while projecting an image of independence from lobbyist and corporate money. In all, the rhetoric is working.
This story of real change will build to one apex in Denver, when Barack Obama will no doubt deliver a rousing speech to a stadium of thousands. It is here where the plot peaks and the narrative is broadcast around the world. It is also here that we must loudly and jubilantly insert our own vision and hope for change.
Realistically, Obama’s honeymoon period will draw to a close after troops are still waging war abroad (whether it be Iraq, Afghanistan, Iran or Pakistan) and neoliberalism continues to wreak havoc on people and the planet. However, by breaking the false consensus that our only hope is trusting another politician we can effectively avoid some of the assimilation of the state now, while also planting in the public conscious the potent alternatives that resist the two-party system and the systems of oppression it upholds.

Laying the Groundwork for the Spectacle...

Continue

Reverend Peyton's Big Damn Band

Fri, 22 Aug 2008 02:56:55 GMT

BEST FUCKING BAND

My Soul To Keep

Canada

Wed, 13 Aug 2008 09:04:32 GMT

I am in Canada. Vancouver, in particular. Canada is nice. The people are nice. The bus drivers are nice, the corner store shopworkers are nice, no one pays attention when you sneak onto the Sky Train...people give me money downtown for playing banjo on the street. I hung out with some new friends and did trippy Reiki in a park with them. I slept at the trout lake park under a willow tree last night, smashed on bunch of plants. People and their poodles strolled by in the morning but no one bothered us.

We accidentally walked over the border to Canada. I would have kept walking if Rachael hadn't dragged me back to customs.

I ran into a friend from Tacoma on the street in Vancouver, I gave her some bananas. She was sweet and told us it takes four days to hop trains from B.C. to Winnipeg. We're just hitching out in the morning anyway.

Life is good. I left Olympia with $2 3 days ago and I'm well fed, tipsy, and with more money than I started with!

Blergh

Tue, 15 Jul 2008 21:43:56 GMT

Today is my last day as an 18-year-old. Whatever that means.

My roommate just got a tattoo apprenticeship. Therefore, I just got an an in-home tattoo test subject apprenticeship.

I'd rather be a tattoo test subject than a fucking pharmaceutical lab rat, like I would have been doing. I was disqualified from an 11-day, $2,575 study on Technosphere Inhalation Powder (sounds like party drugs, right?) for having too much nicotine in my bloodstream. Funny, cause I don't smoke. I'm also anemic. But I am no longer a vegan. Charles River Clinical Services is fucking scary anyway, I don't really want my blood drawn 12 times a day...

San Francisco this weekend for RNC consulta

<3

In the Urban Jungle...

Tue, 17 Jun 2008 20:29:07 GMT

I keep having hunter/gatherer dreams. Hunting packaged meat at Top Foods and gathering fruit from the Metropolitan Market dumpster.

Heading back up to Olympia after a week in Corvallis and Eugene. Can't find a ride, so I'll have to shell out for a Greyhound. Rideshare and Greyhounds have something in common, they both demand too much money, and you're trapped in a vehicle with at least one person desperate to tell you about their diabetic dog. Sometimes for several hours.

Highlights, and lowlights, from my week:

. Took my squeezebox on an impulse trip to Eugene to squeeze into the Broadway Block Party for free with my friends the Bad Mitten Orchestra. It was pretty sad, the turnout was so small there was a security guard for every 3 people, and they started letting dirty hippies in for free anyway. Snuck into the a dive bar, the Tiny Tavern, to watch the Blair Street Mugwumps. It was cramped, hot, full of outcasts, confused tourists...there was a regular wandering around popping balloons with his hook. I sat for a minute at a table, trying to be invisible, when quivering Milton from Office Space (I'm sure of it), sidled up next to me. The man must have been approaching his mid-30's. He took a deep breath, quivered a little bit, and said "excuse me, may I ask you something?" I thought he was going to ID me. He stared into my eyes for about 10 minutes. I raised my eyebrows. He quivered. "May I have your phone number?"

. Stayed with my cousin there. His housemates insisted on playing Roman porn (Caligula). Ew. Things like this always happen in the vicinity of male relatives.

. Watched Eva make papier mache finger puppets. Righteous!

. Snuck up to Fitton Green in the middle of the night with brudder to stumble around in nature, saturated with cheap Vodka, with Olivia on her birthday. Woke up being poked by all sorts of pokey, viney things.

Anyone going to Mutant Fest?

MAY DAY MAY DAY M'AIDER

Mon, 05 May 2008 00:17:31 GMT

I'll explain later, I'm too exhausted to talk about what happened. All's I'm saying is, why do those fuckers always have to go and arrest my husband?!

Rethink what you assumed about pacifism.

Mon, 14 Apr 2008 19:54:29 GMT

Olympia Students for a Democratic Society is still suspended at The Evergreen State College. The group is being targeted by the administration for its politics. Its suspension is a blatant attack on free speech and, symbolically, a threat to the future of activism on college campuses.

"Those who make peaceful revolution impossible make violent revolution inevitable."

Bigotry

Mon, 07 Apr 2008 03:32:13 GMT

I was holding hands with a girl on the bus the other day. When we walked on we received a dirty look from some dirty old man. I was all, whatever, but I started getting pissed off when he kept looking back at us and smirking.

He got off the bus and flipped us off through the window.

Fantasy scenario: I demand the bus stop and wait for me. I exit bus and beat the shit out of this man next to the bus. I reboard bus and kiss my ladyfriend to roaring applause.

Reality: It takes us a second to realize what's happened, so we stay on the bus, but then I start shaking. I am so fucking pissed at this point. I turn my head and force a smile to Shannon. The bus finally gets to campus, I drag Shannon to the front and say

"Excuse me" loudly to everyone on the bus. "Shannon and I just got the finger for being who we are. Don't let this happen in your community!"

We hop off.

P.S. I also got flipped off walking up the hill from downtown with no provocation. Where is this Assholetown, U.S.A. that these nice people call home? Soon it'll be a radioactive wasteland if I can help it.

Edited: I could have made a metric fuckton of money

Wed, 02 Apr 2008 01:14:35 GMT

Why am I such a fucktard? I just sold my Sasquatch 3 Day Pass for $180.

Me, houseless, jobless, married so I can pay for college singlehandedly, my total worth is something like $250 in hard cash and loose change. Other people are selling tickets for $274 and there's still several weeks before the event.

Edit: CRISIS AVERTED!!!

Spaulding/Burlock Easter '08

Tue, 25 Mar 2008 03:20:55 GMT

Going back to Oly in the morning loaded with Easter sugar...

Stephen and his prince.

My cousin Charlie and my brother Josh.

My mom.

Josh.

My dad's JC Penny Easter portrait.

Henry.

Josh and Robyn.

Redheads Robyn, my mom, me.

I had an interesting day yesterday.

Sat, 22 Mar 2008 19:28:01 GMT

Woke up, oh 10-ish, spent morning doing this and that. Hopped around coffee shops, retrieved my banjo, was riding my bike home to make a brief stop before meeting Eva at American Dream. Passed Lisa L on the street who was riding fast the other way...she said "Obama is at American Dream!". Oh. A few seconds it took to register so I turned my bike around and went to Dream a little early. It was swarming with high schoolers, people's parents, reporters, pigs, etc., so I settled into the crowd and procured a picture and high five.

Eva showed up and we went to the other American Dream. As I was walking back from dream to dream, I smelled a most amazing flower smell. I looked up at gigantic pink blossoms in a tree somewhere on campus (Avery Lodge?). I really wanted a flower. With a small running start I tried to make a little knot in the tree where the two trunks separated, but my silly faux-snakeskin loafers slid down the slick bark. Aha! I wrapped my arms around one of the trunks and clasped my hands behind it, in a manner that reminded me of a loaded slingshot, as if arms and hands where a rubber band and the tree ammo. Clinging to the tree, I swung one foot then the other into the tree valley and precariously tried to inch my way up, one foot on each trunk. This didn't work thanks to the loafers. I jumped off the tree into the mud and the sightline of some curious onlookers. I then circled the two buildings that sandwiched the blossoming tree, looking for a fire escape or some way onto the roof. I came across a nearly vertical set of steps that led onto a balcony . I climbed those onto the balcony. I checked to see if there was anyone on the other side of the second story windows. No life, just some rooms with beds and a kitchen. I tried to figure out a way to get myself onto the roof. I could have stacked chairs. Nah. I climbed down the stairs backward, noting how easily a drunk OSU
student could pitch forward and crack their skull if they attempted the same feat. Walking back to the tree, I noticed a rake. Looking around the periphary, I grabbed the rake and headed toward the tree to see if I could climb onto the dumpster and nab a flower off a low-hanging branch. Just as I had one leg on the dumpster and the other dangling, I heard police sirens and bolted, regretfully leaving the honest rake in an odd spot. The gardeners didn't deserve that.

I strolled coolly past the park where a driver was being harrassed by a cop. I continued on, pondering the significance of elusive flowers. As it happens, I sensed I was having an allergic reaction to the pizza I just ate. My first impulse was to go to the nearest store, Safeway, and I mentally thwacked myself for such a stupid reaction. I knocked on the nearest door I recognized, but Mindy Hamlin didn't answer it. I knocked on a few more doors. Finally, my scarf wrapped around my hive-infested head, I chased down a couple walking a pair of dogs.

"Excuse me! Excuse me! Excuse me, do you live closeby?" They looked alarmed.
"Yes, what's the matter?"
"I'm having an allergic reaction to some pizza, do you have any Benadryl?" I said, hastily, because the hives were beginning to itch and my breathing was becoming increasingly shallow.
"We don't live too close, but there's a Safeway two blocks away."

I mentally thwacked them, too. I went to Safeway, covering my face with my hands. I found the aisle with the Benadryl, took it off the shelf, put two on my tongue, and still clutching the opened package, walked down the aisle. At the end were some energy drinks. I opened one and swallowed the pills. I put the half drunk bottle back on the shelf, to the complete ignorance of the two people looking at cheese no more than 4 feet away from me. I staggered to the bathroom in the back, nursed my hives for a minute, pocketed the Benadryl, and made my way out.

I got to my bike, laughed for five minutes, and pedaled home. Then, totally drugged out, I crashed fully clothed and unbrushed for 13 hours in my bed.

Not my revolution, Abbie!

Thu, 20 Mar 2008 21:51:08 GMT

HOLY FUCKING JESUS SHIT

I read this, and couldn't sleep for hours. I guess it's totally out of context from the rest of his work, but God Damn, this makes me want to give Abbie Hoffman a swift kick in the nuts for this particular man-centric religious bullshit. And Abra-fucking-ham too. Not MY revolution, Hoffman.

    "Abraham, grand old man of 9,000 years, striding across the desert lands, sweat crushed against his brow by a huge sun-baked forearm of golden fleece, the same golden fleece that hung from his head and face in cascading waves of hard times.
    God says, 'Abraham, take your beloved son Isaac to the land of Moriah and place him upon an altar and make of him a sacrifice.'
    And Abraham tightens his fists and gnarls his teeth and cries out, 'How do I know that this is the God that has guided me and my people all these years?'
    Inside he knows because He is God, which is to say, a Man and not a machine. He bids goodbye to Sarah, whom he truly loves, and he walks, holding his young son's tender hand, the three miles to Moriah. Placing his son upon the carefully constructed altar, he binds and gags him to let his son know that he loves him, yet he does not need to do that because the boy too loves his father and needs no bindings. There would be no pain. Then Abraham dabs the boy with holy water that he had carried from his holy well and recites a few ritual prayers, mumbling them rotely because three days ago when he talked to God, he had already decided he would do what he must do. He holds his left hand over his son's eyes and raises the long well-used knife in the air, poising it for that final plunge. One plunge, quickly, for the steel in his mighty arm-sword will need but one thrust upon the young lad's frail body.
    'Abraham, I am your God.'
    He slumps, exhausted with joy. It was an orgasm of consciousness, pulsating down rows upon rows of mankind.

Trust your impulses. Trust your impulses. TRUST--TRUST--TRUST--TRUST--TRUST---TRUST--
             Test
                   Test
                         Test
                               Relax
The trouble with liberalism and bull-shit American middle class DOT--DOT--BEEP--BEEPs is that they run the myth backwards.

'God is dead,' they cry, 'and we did it for the kids.'"

                               --Abbie Hoffman, Excerpt from Revolution for the Hell of It

Haha

Wed, 19 Mar 2008 21:05:38 GMT

I never read shit like this, so I can't detect the sarcasm. In the "Ask Marilyn" column of The Oregonian's Parade:

What do you consider "complimentary" at a hotel? Is it OK to take an apple from the breakfast buffet to eat later? What about the little bottles of shampoo?
--Melda Thornton, San Diego, Calif.

Complimentary items are intended to be consumed at the hotel. If you take them home, you are being cheap in a small way. That's unattractive. Worse, being cheap can lead to being stingy.

...

What does this mean? Is Melda serious? Is Marilyn serious? Melda Thornton was pretty damn earnest with her question. And due to the nature of the rest of the column, in which the other responses were all as equally earnest as the questions, I would be led to believe that Marilyn vos Savant actually scorns the theft of shampoo from honest hotel corporations such as the Hilton, Mariott Inn, Holiday Inn, what have you...

But on the other hand, Melda was so sweet, so blind, so controlled, that I can't help but guess that Marilyn was struck but the stark stupidity of her inquiry. She was shocked into a state of transcendence and couldn't help but print a tongue-in-cheek response to poor, mislead, Melda's question.

I commend Marilyn for her recognition of blind consumerism at its finest. But I condemn her,

A) For giving a response so laden with sarcasm that poor Melda would be unable to detect, and

B) For implying that it's okay to fork over money to hotels as long as you, ahem, "one-up" them by pocketing shampoo and apples.

Can I rolly back to Oly now?

Wed, 19 Mar 2008 01:00:51 GMT

Note: having your mom buy you shit does NOT count as freeganism.